I now pronounce you…..

Oh no! Not another Royal Wedding article! Love it or hate it, on 29th April everyone will know exactly where they were when William and Kate finally tie the knot.

However this topic has been covered far too extensively by the media for me – a simple, reasonably attractive, blonde, single third year – to shed any new light on. Therefore I shall comment (as this is indeed the ‘Comment & Debate’ section), on why it is that women have far more control over this special day than men do.

Now before you all sigh in a bored “heard it all” kind of way, just hear me out… ..or at least read me out. The inspiration for this topic came to me this morning, while eating breakfast and watching (I’ll never forgive myself for saying this) Bridezillas. I watched in horror as these awful brides mistreated not only their friends and families but also their future husbands in a quest to have the ‘perfect wedding’. I found myself discussing with a friend: why do women do this? And he said a very memorable thing – he’d be lucky even to be invited to his own wedding.

This sad realisation that most men have, that they will simply be expected to turn up on the day, whether they want to arrive in the pink limousine or not, shows just how little input and control they have over their own weddings. Forgive me if I’m wrong but Rob Base and DJ E-Z Rock’s lyrics do not state “it takes one woman and a wedding planner to make a thing go right”…..though it would hilarious if it did!

Now I know that right now many members of my sex are screaming in rage at this article, either because they think it’s pants and wished they’d turned the page sooner, or because I’ve actually made a point – my dissertation advisor would be proud. It’s true that many women have planned in some shape or form how they want to get married, whether it be religious, spiritual, or even the more exciting option of elopement (yes you know who you are!). Even those who haven’t decided anything for certain have at least given enough thought to the matter that they know what they do and do not like, therefore my question is simple; as this day is special for both parties, why does it always tend to fall down to the bride to rage about what she wants?

Granted this doesn’t apply to everyone, and I don’t wish to ruffle anyone’s feathers by suggesting all women behave like this, but be honest girls, each one of us knows at least three girlfriends who are going to be absolute nightmares when it comes down to wedding planning. The funny thing is though, is that a woman’s rigid control over the planning of her own wedding is usually completely out of character to her normal disposition. However, for some unknown reason as soon as she hears those weddings bells and gets that big sparkling rock on her finger (yes we do like that bit), then suddenly demonic possession begins and god help a man if he was to intervene in some way. Nothing better sums this up than one of my favourite films, Sliding Doors, where the lead man is confused as ever as to what he has to do to make the situation right. “But you haven’t told me what you want!” He shouts, and she very calmly replies “Jerry I’m a woman, we never say what we want, but we reserve the right to be pissed off if we don’t get it”. This last sentence will have hit home with a few of you guys round campus for sure, knowing that when your significant other is in a mood with you, you’ll probably not have the tiniest inkling in the world as to why this is and this I suppose answers my question.

If there is one day of the year you do not want to mess up guys, it’s your wedding because the mood that followed if it went wrong would be terminal. Men of the world it seems therefore take a step back on organisation of this particular event in order to spare themselves the possibility of their future wife’s wrath.. ..good choice.

“The man may be the head of the family, but the woman is the neck, and we turn the head” My Big Fat Greek Wedding- couldn’t have put it better myself.

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