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Let us embrace the changes at Holloway

One of the causes for discontent amongst some students are the refurbishments that have taken place over the summer. Personally, I would like to applaud the way in which the university has taken the money we have given them not to refurbish buildings where some vague form of learning takes place (e.g. the barely standing portacabins of Queen’s Annex and Munroe Fox), but to revamp Crosslands, an integral cog in the academic machine of Royal Holloway. Any student who walks into Crosslands has to be taken aback by the delightfully busy way in which it has been redesigned. We can see that they must have struggled intensely to find the highly respected, highly paid blind yuppie interior designer they hired. What pleases me in particular is the fact that they are banning tiring performances like the Holloway Players and Crosslands Unplugged. Students don’t seem to understand that riff-raff like the aforementioned simply don’t fit in with the new décor. How can Crosslands allow students to gather in a fashion that would promote and encourage the use of their unique talents in various ways when they are clearly gearing up to entertain wealthy business clients and wedding receptions? It simply wouldn’t do.

In any case, it isn’t as if the university isn’t trying its level best to please all the liberal hippies who seem to collect everywhere like swarms of flies. They have gone through the enormous effort of building a social learning space that takes up a whole floor of the Bedford library to the tune of £1, 000, 000. According to an article in the The Orbital, there will be nearly three times as many seats and refreshment facilities. I would say that is £1, 000, 000 extremely well spent. Just try to imagine the existence of a part of this university where you can not only freely talk to the person next to you while sitting down but also get a coffee at the same time. Utopia in its true form. My suggestion to the Holloway Players would be to put together their performance in this charming new social learning space; that way participants would be caffeinated rather than falling over themselves and their jokes in drunkenness.

At the end of a long day, Royal Holloway is really a big business. As students, we need to accept the fact that their goal is profit; we are simply bystanders in a world of commerce after all. How can we blame them for accepting larger and larger amounts of students each year, even if it does cause us to go down in league tables? They desperately need the funds to pump into projects like the new halls of residence, all of which are exactly alike in appearance to the most expensive halls currently on campus, Gowar and Wedderburn. Halls that operate like a military base are truly necessary, it is vitally important that they attract the sorts of students who will spend in that fashion. Who else do you think will be willing to pay a slightly higher amount to drink in a bar that makes you feel like you are bleeding money out of your eyes? So I say ring the bells of capitalism till echoes reverberate all overÂ…well, Egham. As graduates we will be able to take immense pride in saying that we were once part of the greatest entrepreneurial venture of our time.

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